A is for Alphabet Drabbles
by AbbieDabbie
Summary: Alphabet Drabbles about my favorite couple. Hope you enjoy:)
1. A is for Apples

**I just decided to do some SnowBaz themed Alphabet Drabbles, because I don't wirte enough fluff about them as it is. These will probably be short and fairly random, with no plot to connect them. Enjoy!**

**All Characters mentioned here are property of Rainbow Rowell. **

A is for Apples

Baz inhaled deeply as he entered the room, taking in the sweet, appley smell. Wherever his boyfriend went, that smell followed. It used to annoy him, but now he couldn't think of anything that smelled quite so wonderful. He loved to snuggle close to Simon on dark, cold nights and bury his head in his warm, honey brown hair, just breathing in that smell. It calmed him down and could bring a smile to his face no matter what was going on. It was just so... _Simon._ Yes, Baz absolutely adored the smell of apples.

**Hope you enjoyed it! Sorry it was so short. Please review, and Thanks for reading!**


	2. B is for Borrowed Clothes

**I really don't know what this is... I'm so sorry.**

**These characters belong to Rainbow Rowell**

B is for Borrowed Clothes

Baz growled in frustration as he looked through his closet. He _knew_ his sweater was in there somewhere, he had hung it up last night! But now that he actually needed it, it was nowhere to be found. As his mood became darker and he tore through the closet with greater and greater fury, the door swung open and Simon entered the room with a cheery "Morning, Baz!" The vampire tok a deep, calming breath and turned to greet his boyfriend. "Hey Si-" As he looked at Simon, the words stuck in his throat, replaced with an indignant grunt. Simon was wearing his sweater, The sweater he had spent all morning searching for!

Baz spluttered and choked for a moment before pointing towards an extremely confused looking Simon and saying "That's _my _sweater!" Simon looked down at the offending piece of clothing and said with an easy smile "Yeah, I borrowed it 'cause I was cold and I couldn't find mine. That's ok, right?"

"Ok? _OK?! _I've been looking for that thing all morning! Besides, why do you just assume you can take it? What if _I _had gotten cold?" Simon paused for a moment, then smiled slightly, desperately fighting off giggles. "Do vampires even get cold?" he wondered aloud, but Baz simply waved his hand airily and said "That is completely besides the point. You shouldn't have taken it without asking, I might have needed it for... something!" And with that less than impressive finish, he stormed huffily out of the rom, leaving Simon to wonder at the strange mood his boyfriend was in.

The next day, Simon walked into the room to see Baz sitting at his desk reading. This by itself was not at all peculiar, Baz was an avid reader, but the thing he was wearing was. He was wearing Simon's worn, fuzzy red sweater. When he notice the other boy standing in the room, mouth hanging open, he sneered and said in a sickeningly sweet voice "I'm just borrowing it. You don't mind, right?" Simon shut his mouth and narrowed his eyes. So Baz wanted a war? Fine, he would get a war.

Over the next few days, The boys stole an increasing amount of clothes, ranging everywhere from hats to shoes (Even though Baz was a size or two smaller than Simon, making them both look utterly ridiculous). Although it wasn't enough to be noticed by their classmates, every item 'borrowed' fuled the war between them, neither wanting to admit defeat.

One morning, a week after the feud began, a glowering Simon and Baz sat down next to Penny and Agatha in the dining hall. The girls glanced at each other nervously (they knew that fights between the roommates never ended well) before stealing a quick glance at the two boys. What they saw made them burst out laughing, much to the confusion and annoyance of Snow and Pitch. The two had completely switch wardrobes, Simon wearing dark, too small too tight clothes and Baz looking as though he had decided to try a career in clowning, with loose pastel clothes and shoes that were far too large.

**That's all, folks! **

**Thanks for reading and be sure to leave a review!**


	3. C is for Cake

**Hi There! This is just another wacky little oneshot, enjoy:) **

**These characters belong to Rainbow Rowell**

C is for Cake

Baz knew something was wrong the moment he came within fifty feet of their room (being a vampire did have its perks), but he didn't begin to panic until he rounded the corner and saw thin tendrils of smoke drifting through the cracks in the door. He stopped dead in his tracks, the horrible smell of burning chemicals filling his nose, and paused for a moment before one thought over took him, causing panic to rise in his chest as he ran for the room; _"What if Simon is in there?!"_.  
Eyes watering and throat stinging, he barged into the room, expecting to see... He didn't know what he expected, something horrible. But what was there when he entered was enough to make him stand, heart still pounding, in the doorway, mouth hanging wide open as he stared at his boyfriend.  
Simon Snow was standing on his bed scraping what appeared to be burnt chocolate cake off the ceiling. When he noticed Baz, he grinned sheepishly and said "Cooking mishap. Would you be alright just having Aero Bars for your birthday?"

**Like it? Hate it? Please leave a review! **

**Thanks for reading!**


	4. D is for Date

**Hello! Sorry it took me so long to post this: I've had sever writers block. This fic is me forcing myself to write, so it may not be very good. Oh, well. Enjoy:)**

**These characters belong to Rainbow Rowell.**

D is for Date

Baz loved Watford, but it was difficult to have a romantic night out with his boyfriend when they had class all day and then had to be in their room by curfew (not that he and Simon were known for following rules, but even if they did sneak out, there wasn't exactly a great selection of restaurants nearby since the school was out in the middle of nowhere). But Baz was not one to give up easily, he was going to take his boyfriend out on a date if it was the last thing he did!

That night, the vampire snuck out of their room before his boyfriend returned from meeting Penelope in the library, leaving behind a note telling Simon to meet him in a clearing in the forest they had gone to many times before. Once he got there, Baz rushed around making preparations.

* * *

Simon picked his way through the forest to the clearing, wondering why on earth Baz had wanted to meet him. It wasn't like this was the only way they could see each; they slept only a few feet apart, after all. As he grew closer, he began to see a small flickering light, and smell something absolutely delicious. pushing aside a branch, he saw his wonderful boyfriend, standing next to a table with steaming plates of pie and two slowly burning candles. "Surprise." Baz said with a grin. Simon smiled back and walked forwards, ready to enjoy an amazing night.

**Sorry it's so short, hopefully the next one will be longer! **

**Don't forget to review, and thanks for reading!**


	5. E is for Eyebrows

**Yeah... I need sleep. I don't know what the frickle frack this chapter is, but I'm sorry. **

**Rainbow Rowell owns these characters, I'm just borrowing them for a while.**

E is for Eyebrows

Simon could always tell what Baz was thinking, not because they were deeply connected to each others emotions or anything like that, but because his boyfriend had the most expressive eyebrows ever. When he was annoyed, they would crinkled down and almost come together, when he was surprised the would rocket towards his widow's peak like they were trying to grab it, when he was amused the left one would do a funny little slide upward and the right would scrunch down. Each mood had an eyebrow movement to go with it, and Simon loved all of them. Once or twice, he had tried to copy Baz's expressions when he was alone, but they never looked quite the same. His thin honey brown eyebrows just weren't capable of doing the things that the fuzzy black caterpillars living on his boyfriends face could do.

One day, while they sat on the floor of their room and talked, Simon found himself watching Baz's eyebrows. As he watched, he decided to try to copy their movements. Very subtly so he wouldn't attract his boyfriends attention, he began to mirror Baz's eyebrows. There was his annoyed look, there was the one he made whenever recounting something funny, there was his happy look. After a while, they settled into the look Baz made whenever he thought Simon was doing something ridiculous and idiotic. It was only then that Simon realized the vampire had stopped talking and was staring at him. Quickly returning his face to a neutral expression, he looked back, hoping he wasn't as red as he felt. Baz shook his head and said in a flat voice "I don't even want to know what the hell you're doing, Si." Simon scratched the back of his neck and grinned sheepishly, wondering how to explain that he got distracted by Baz's eyebrows.

**I would like to apologize again for whatever this thing is. Next chapter will be better, I promise! Please leave a review, and thanks for reading:)**


	6. F is for Future

**Hello! This chapter is kind of short, but it's a lot less ridiculous than the last one. Simon and Baz both think about their future together. Enjoy!**

**I wish I was Rainbow Rowell, but I'm not, so Simon and Baz aren't mine.**

F is for Future

For the first few months of their relationship, Baz walked on eggshells, worried that if he said the wrong thing or made a wrong move everything would fall apart. As time went on, Simon's calm, happy nature put him at ease and he began to wonder if, perhaps, there was a future for them and this wasn't just a fleeting romance. A strange feeling of warmth bubbled up in his chest whenever he thought about this, and the longer he spent with Simon, the more he knew: he was the one.

* * *

Simon Snow was head over heels in love with his boyfriend, Baz, and he knew without a doubt that would never change. Whenever they sat together on Baz's bed, wrapped in blankets that were magically heated to ward off the cold that seemed to be constantly present at Watford, his mind would always stray to the future, when he and Baz would move in together, marry, maybe someday adopt a kid or two. It calmed him to know that no matter where he went in life the vampire would be there with him, his other half. Because the love they had was eternal, Simon could see that as clear as day.

**I'm working on the next chapter now, so it should be up by this time tomorrow. Please leave a review, and thanks for reading:)**


	7. G is for Goodbye

**Hello! **

**I'm not Rainbow Rowell, so these lovely characters aren't mine.**

G is for Goodbye

"Baz, don't leave!"

"I'm sorry, Simon. I have to."

Simon felt like his entire world was falling apart. Baz was leaving. The love of his life, his better half, would be gone. He felt like falling down right there and sobbing until he had no tears left. What was he supposed to do on his own? Without Baz, he just wasn't complete. The vampire sighed "Goodbye, Snow."

"NO!" Simon reached out and grabbed Baz's hand, desperate to stay with him. "What am I going to do without you?" he said, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. Baz stared at him incredulously "For Crowleys sake, Si, it's just two days. Get Penelope and Agatha to keep you company."

"But two days is such a long time." whined Simon, sticking out his lower lip. Baz leaned in to give him one final kiss, rolling his eyes and laughing as he said "Goodbye, idiot."

**This one was really fun to write:)**

**Please leave a review, and thanks for reading!**


	8. H is for Home

**This one is fairly sappy and cliched. Enjoy:)**

**These fantastic characters aren't mine.**

H is for Home

Simon Snow spent his early life at the orphanage, living with a bunch of children he never quite fit in with, and it had never seemed like home. It always felt temporary, just a place to wait until he found where he truly belonged. At first, coming to Watford, he had felt like that idea of "home" had finally been achieved, that that was the one place above all others where he was meant to be. But then, he found Baz, and realized that all along something had been missing, and he hadn't even noticed.

Baz completed the picture of happiness he had always imagined home to be. He walked into the room, and Simon's heart fluttered and his face lit up. As long as he was there, Simon felt safe, confident, strong. He loved the vampire more than life it's self, and was elated to know that the feeling was mutual. They had given each other there hearts, and after all, home is where the heart is.

**A little heads up:**

**I've been writing a lot recently, but with the school year staring, I might be slowing down. I'm really busy with choir (they gave me a binder so big it hardly fits in my bag!) and other things. This does not mean I'm stopping this story, because I love writing it and would die without fanfiction, but after next week, updates may not come quite as regularly. I'll do my best, though:)**

**Please leave a review, and thanks for reading!**


	9. I is for Iceskating

**I'm finally back with another chapter! Sorry for the long wait:)**

**Fangirl is owned by Rainbow Rowell, not me. **

I is for Iceskating

Winter at Watford was beautiful. The snow would blanket the school and turn it into a fairy land, and every once in a while a teacher would give in to the begging of the students and cancel class, allowing the children to run out side enjoy it's majesty. On one such day, Simon Snow and Basilton Pitch headed out to the frozen pond, skates slung over their shoulders.

The night before, while they lounged in front of the fire in the Main Hall, Baz had accidentally let slip that he had never gone iceskating. This proved to be a horrible mistake; Simon immediately decided to teach him. And so here he was, freezing in the sharp winter air, wobbling in uncomfortable shoes and falling down repeatedly onto hard ice. How fun. Simon glided over to him with ease and helped him to his feet. "Try taking it slow, Baz. You don't have to race all around the pond on your first try."

Sighing dramatically, Baz took a few wobbly steps, then fell over again. "It's no use." He growled, struggling to his feet "I just can't do it!" Simon slid forward and grabbed his hands. Smiling gently, he said "Let me help you." For the rest of the day, Simon stayed by Baz's side, holding his hands and keeping him from falling. By the time the sun began to set, they were circling around the pond with ease. Slowly, they came to a stop in the middle of the pond. "Wasn't that fun?" Said Simon, his bright, ever present smile shining in the dusk. Baz grinned and pulled his boyfriend closer.

"Of course it was." he said quietly "I was with you."

**Please leave a review, and thanks for reading!**


	10. J is for Just Us

**So... I'm not dead. **

**So sorry about the long wait, things have been crazy and I haven't really had any ideas for this story, and (insert excuses here). But enough about that, onto the story! **

**I wish I would have written a better chapter after disappearing for a month, but oh well. This one is... slightly more mature than the others ;) but nothing really happens.**

**I don't own Fangirl (although I really wish I did) **

J is for Just Us

Baz was about to groan and let his head fall onto the table when Simon caught his eye. They had a brief mental argument, and then Baz sighed defeatedly and put on a forced smile. "Of course you're not bothering us. Do we look bothered, or bored out of our skulls, or like we would rather die than be here another second, or-" Simon cleared his throat and kicked Baz under the table. Baz kicked him back and said "So, please. Continue this fascinating story about... Whatever it was you were talking about."

"I was asking you if you wanted to come with me and Aggie for the week off. We're allowed to go, and her parents have this awesome little cabin near the beach that we could stay in." Penelope said, rolling her eyes at Baz. "That sounds great!" Simon said, while Baz simultaneously said "We can't, sorry." Penelope ignored the intense eye contact and beneath-the-table-shin-kicking for a few minutes, then gave up on getting a timely answer and shook her head with a laugh. "Well, think it over. You can tell me tomorrow." There was no reaction. Irritated, she waved her hands between their eyes and said "Earth to Simon and Baz! I need an answer by tomorrow, ok?"

"Yeah." Simon replied, only half paying attention, "Great."

* * *

"What was all that about?" Simon asked once Penelope had gone "Why are you being so rude?"

"Why am I-" Baz laughed incredulously "No, snow, the real question is why are you being so... unrude?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that you always say yes to whatever Penelope wants!"

"I do not! I only agreed 'cause it sounded like fun!"

"Oh yeah, loads of fun. Sitting around with a bunch of mosquitos while getting sunburned, eating bad food and talking to people. That's my idea of a grand time!"

"Well, what did you have in mind for our week off? Sitting around twiddling our thumbs, waiting for school to start again?" Suddenly Baz's anger was gone, and he acted almost bashful. "Actually, I thought we could spend some, um, _quality time _together. You know, just us."

"Oh." Simon said nonchalantly, then his eyes got big and the corners of his mouth turned up "_Oh._"

"Yeah." Said Baz with a grin. "What do you think of that plan?"

* * *

"Hey Simon, what's going on?" Penelope asked answering the door with a smile, which quickly shifted into a rather annoyed expression "If that was all you guys waned to do, go to your room and let me get back to my homework." With a giggle, Simon untabgled himself from Baz's arms and said. "Actually, Penny, we were coming to say we probably won't be able to make it to the cabin this time. We're... um... you know." Penelope raised her hands and waved them in front of her face "Please, say no more. I'll tell Aggie you two... had other plans. The offer still stands though, if you change your minds." Simon grinned "I don't think that's going to happen. We both really want to spend some time together, just us."

**The end! **

**The next chapter will be up soon and will be better than this one, I promise!**


	11. K is for Klutz

**So that took longer than expected. In my defense though, these last few weeks I've been thinking of one thing and one thing only: Percy Jackson. The last book came out and I was going slightly insane waiting for it. A pretty weak excuse, but it's the only one I have. Onto the story!**

**I don't own fangirl.**

K is for Klutz

"Sorry!" Baz rolled his eyes in exasperation as he tidied up the mess of books that Simon had knocked off his desk with a flick of his wand "Don't worry about it." He said with a sigh. Although he acted annoyed by his boyfriend's clumsiness, he actually secretly found it adorable and hilarious. Adorable because he would go pink and apologize over and over, hilarious because the great Mage's Heir, who everyone in the magic world knew about and thought of as a brave, strong, handsome hero (which of course he was, but that was entirely besides the point) couldn't even walk across their little room without knocking something over. He wondered what the world would think if they knew that only one person stood a chance defeating the Humdrum, and that person was about as ferocious as an overgrown puppy.

"Honestly Snow," Baz said "How do you expect to be a hero when you can't even walk properly. You're such a klutz." Simon's ears burned bright red and he made a rude gesture at his boyfriend. Baz simply laughed and grabbed hold of Simon's hand, pulling him in close "You know, you're a real pain." Simon said, the corners of his mouth twitching up slightly. Baz snickered "I live to torment you, love." He said, making his boyfriend roll his eyes. Baz took a step forward to close the distance between them and kiss his boyfriend, when his foot snagged on the corner of the rug, launching both him and Simon forward onto the floor in a pile of tangled limbs. Shocked and winded, both boys lay still for a moment, the vampire sprawled across Simon's chest. Then, Simon smiled "Who's the klutz now?"

**The end. Short, I know, but hopefully there's enough fluffiness to make up for that fact. **

**I am working on the next one now, so it WILL be up by Saturday at the latest! **


	12. L is for Little Things

**Here it is, and within the deadline, too! **

**I don't own Fangirl**

L is for Little Things

When Simon had first started to fall in love with Baz, it had been gradual. Not that wild, sudden realization that happened so often in stories. And it had all started with the little things.

Baz would get this expression sometimes when he was reading a good book and he didn't think anyone was watching. He would lean forward towards the pages and stare at them intensely, as if he believed intimidating them would influence the outcome. Then his eyes would go wide, and his eyebrows would shoot up so high they would meet his widow's peak. When ever he would notice Simon watching, he would leer and make a snarky comment, but Simon could tell he was embarrassed about being caught showing anything resembling emotion. It was absolutely adorable.

Simon loved how dramatic Baz got when he was annoyed. He would fling his hands in the air, stomp around the room and make the odd grunting sound, all the while cursing Simon and everything he stood for. Typically, qualities like this were not considered endearing, but with Baz, it made him smile rather than repent whatever action had sent Baz into his theatrics.

Simon loved the way Baz would flick his hair long hair off his shoulders when he was trying to concentrate. He loved the way he would bite his lip. He loved the way he would mumble random things in his sleep. He even loved the way Baz chastised him and teased him when he did something stupid (which was a lot). He loved all Baz's little quirks and habits, because when they were all put together, they added up to Baz, and that meant they were all absolutely perfect.

**Next time (Monday at the latest): M is for Marriage!**


	13. M is for Marriage

I** don't own Fangirl**

M is for Marriage

Baz's heart was going faster than it ever had in his life. Why was he so nervous? All he had to do was listen then answer with two little words, but he couldn't focus. Simon had already said it, and Baz's brain was busy replaying that moment over and over in his head. _"This is real." _he thought for the thousandth time that day _"It's really happening." _

Baz looked over at the man standing next to him. They had been through so much together; hating each other in their first year, learning slowly how to work together (after Baz finally stopped trying to sabotage him, that is), the Humdrum. Baz couldn't help but think that everything was leading up to this, that they were always meant to be together. Typically, he would have scoffed at such a horribly cliched idea, but right now, standing next to the man of his dreams (_"My soulmate" _he thought happily), it seemed like the most beautiful thought in the world. Simon caught his eye and smiled, immediately calming the butterflies in his stomach. He wanted to reach out and kiss him right then, but there was a protocol to these things and he had to stick to script.

Without turning away from the love of his life, too happy to even fully registering what he had said, two words fell from his lips.

"I do."

**Before the dead line again! I'm finally making up for those weeks where I disappeared off the face of the planet! I don't know what I'm doing for the next one, but I don't have school on Monday, which means two more days of doing nothing but writing fanfiction, so I should come up with something...**

**Thanks for reading, and please leave a review:) **


	14. N is for Nightmares

**Late again! I'm so, SO sorry! I really suck at deadlines. Life keeps getting in the way of my fanfiction writing! **

**I wish I owned Fangirl, but I don't.**

N is for Nightmares

Baz shot up with a start upon hearing the pained screaming from beside him. Although it was very late, and he had little sleep that night, he sprung to action, immediately wide awake. He pulled Simon- who was still asleep despite his cries- into his arms and held him tight, rocking back and forth saying in a strong voice "Simon, love, wake up. It's just a dream, I'm right here. You've got to _wake up._" He continued this until Simon woke up with a sob "The Humdrum!" He said wildly "It's here, Baz it came back!" Baz continued to rock his boyfriend back and forth. "It was just a dream, Si. You beat it years ago, and it is never _ever _coming back." Simon just buried his face in Baz's chest and shook his head. "It all felt so real."

"Hey." Baz said seriously, holding Simon at arm's length so that he could look him in the eye. "It's over. You won. And if he ever does manage to crawl out if hell, which he won't, I'll be right there, and I'll protect you. Do you understand?" the Mage's Heir nodded and gave a watery smile "I'm sorry I woke you up."

"Don't be. I owe you one. Or two. Or twenty. Or... well the point is, you've saved my life millions of times in millions of ways, and it's time I returned the favor." He pulled Simon close and kissed his forehead softly. "Now go back to sleep." he said. Simon nodded and snuggled closer to the vampire. Just as he was drifting off, he whispered "I love you, Baz." Baz smiled "Love you too, Snow."

**I have a headcanon that after the big, final battle with the Humdrum (which Simon wins), Simon gets nightmares sometimes, and Baz is the only one who can calm him down. **

**Next chapter should (hopefully) be finished by Saturday night, but I have a big concert coming up so it might be more like Monday or Tuesday. Thanks for reading, and please leave a review! **


	15. O is for Obnoxious and Obstreperous

**Hi! Ummm... So I'm not dead!  
I'm incredibly sorry for the insanely long wait. I've been super busy, and i've had writer's block, and homework, and... **

**You know what? I'm just going to skip the litany of excuses and cut to the chase. **

O is for Obnoxious and Obstreperous

_"Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap tap."_

Baz dropped his head onto his desk and groaned. "For Crowley's sake Snow! Stop that bloody racket!" Simon stopped tapping his pencil on the desk and looked up "What's wrong, Baz?"

"Oh, nothing. Just the fact that I'm trying to study for a test and _you _are making that completely bloody impossible! Now please, just shut up for one hour so I can concentrate!" Simon blinked "Um... Okay. I'm sorry. No more noise." Baz sighed and turned back to his work. After a minute or two passed,A very monotonous, very out of tune humming started from the other side of the room. Baz tightened his grip on his pencil, trying to stay calm. He took a deep breath and started counting in his head _'1, 2, 3, 4, 5- '_

"KNOCK IT OFF, SNOW!"

"I'm just studying."

"No you're just studying _while_ humming like an idiot!" Baz put his head in his hands. "Just please, _please_ be quiet." Baz turned back to his study guide. He had just started to relax when Simon started tapping his pencil again. "THAT'S IT!" He pushed off from his desk, sent his wheeled chair flying towards where Simon was sitting, and whacked him on the back of the head. "Ow!" Simon yelped and jumped up "What the hell, Baz?!"

"Stop the noise!"

"All I'm doing is tapping my pencil!"

"All I'm doing is tapping my pencil!" Baz yelled in a high pitched, nasally voice. "You're the annoying one!"

"You're the annoying one!"

"What are you doing? Cut it out!

"What are you doing? Cut it out!" Simon threw his arms up "I give up! I'll go study somewhere else so I don't bother you!" He ran a hand through his hair "You're really obnoxious, you know?"

"Wow! Simon Snow breaking out the big words! Three whole syllables! That has to be one of the largest words you've ever used!"

"Oh, shut up!"

"Well, here's another big word for you! You're obstreperous!" Simon yelled back "I'm not... obstre-"

"Yes you are! Noisy and difficult to control, sound familiar? Now shut up and leave me alone before I go completely insane!" Baz stormed back across the room, dragging his chair along with him. No sooner had he sat down than a snort came from behind him. he whipped around and it turned into a full laugh. He stared at Simon like he had gone insane. "What's so funny?" Simon laughed some more, shaking his head. Baz growled "What is it?"

"Nothing." Simon shook his head "It's just... you're absolutely ridiculous sometimes. I mean, all that over a bit of noise?" Baz was about to start screaming again, but Simon walked over to him and grabbed his hands, pushing all the stress out of his mind almost instantly. "I'm sorry for being so... obstreperous" he said with a pointed look at his boyfriend. "Will you forgive me?" Baz sighed and leaned into Simon's arms. "Yes," he said grudgingly "But I still need to study, and so do you. Somehow I don't think Miss Possibelf is going to care much wether you're the Mage's Heir or not while she's grading your test." Simon laughed and pulled Baz closer. "We've been studying for almost three hours. Don't you think we could..." Simon kissed Baz lightly and grinned "...take a little break?" Baz grinned back and nodded "Well, maybe just a short one."

**I'm working on the next chapter now, it will be up by Monday. **


	16. P is for Pivotal Moments

**Ugh, I'm sorry I didn't update. My computer crashed right before I could update and lost everything I had written. But I'm here now! **

P is for Pivotal Moments

The first time Simon got a full night of sleep in his room at Watford was halfway through the second year. Baz had undone all his plans, tried to kill him and sabotaged his homework all in one day, and so he was feeling far more paranoid than usual, lying awake and watching Baz narrowly as but then Baz had struck up a conversation, which wasn't something that Baz normally did.

"What in the name of Crowley are you doing? You and a wand are never a good combination, and with you falling asleep and looking half-dead, I'd be surprised if you didn't kill someone, preferably yourself." Simon snorted and crossed his arms over his chest "After one and a half years of your evil... evilness," Baz raised an eye brow, sarcastically "Well said, Snow." sarcastically, but Simon waved the words away like he was swatting a particularly nasty fly and continued "You know what I mean. After all the crap you've done, you really expect me to sleep without some sort of protection? You'd probably kill me the minute my eyes were closed. I don't trust you, Baz."

If Baz's eyebrows went up any further, they would be floating above his head. Slowly, he seemed to come out of shock. "Wow." Baz said finally "That was the stupidest thing I've ever heard in my entire life." Simon opened his mouth to speak, but Baz wasn't finished. "First off, there is plenty of time to mess with your head and, hopefully, kill you, but I had a big day and I want some rest. Second, your skills with a wand are so horrible you'd probably end up hexing yourself trying to fight me off, which makes you're using a wand as protection about as effective as trying to put out a fire with gasoline. And third, you seem to have completely forgotten the Roommate's Anathema. I like Watford, so I'm going to do everything within my power not to get expelled, which means no hurting you in this room, my dear roomie. Alas, I will simply have to settle for hurling insults and barbed words. So go to sleep already, just looking at you is annoying."

Simon blinked in shock. "Oh, go on you idiot! I'm not going to do anything." Baz yelled. When Simon still didn't respond, Baz rolled his eyes. "Fine, do what you want. I'm going to bed." And he did just that. Simon stared at his snoring roommate in... amazement wasn't the right word, more like sheer, mind numbing confusion. He laid back, oddly put at ease by Baz's speech, and was asleep within minutes. The next morning, he woke up completely unharmed, much to his delighted surprise. Maybe, just maybe, Baz wasn't completely horrible after all.

* * *

Baz and Simon hated each other with a passion until around the end of year four, when they ended up extremely late to Professor Estep's class, Simon with a black eye, Baz with a busted lip, and both sopping wet. "Boys," their teacher said slowly "What exactly were you doing and why are you so late?" Baz gulped. His records were already ... colorful this year, and if he got any more detentions, he would be having some incredibly bad conversations with his father. Surprisingly, before he could even begin to think of a lie, Simon Snow, Simon golden-boy-Mage's-Heir-perfect-always-tells-the-truth Snow stepped in with one. "It's my fault, Sir. I, er, I fell into the moat and hit my head. If Baz hadn't helped me out, I would have been Mer-wolf food." Professor Estep didn't look all that convinced (which wasn't a big surprise. Simon wasn't exactly an expert liar - and in fact was absolutely awful), but he just sighed and said "Alright, go to your seats. Now, as I was saying. Odysseus -"

Professor Estep continued his lecture while the boys walked to the two empty seats in the back of the classroom. "Thanks." Baz whispered "That was... unexpected." Simon shrugged "It was the least I could do. You helped me save the third Selkie from that Mer-Wolf, and kept me alive. I owe you at least one favor." Baz almost smiled. Then he remembered that this was his horrible, awful, goody-two-shoes roommate and smirked instead. "Oh, you owe me way more than that, I'd say at _least_ three Aero bars worth of favors. And we definitely need to work on your lying skills," he said. "We're lucky we got away with that at all." Simon just grinned and turned back to the teacher.

* * *

Baz's mouth ha gone dry and his heart was beating so hard it felt like it was about to explode out of his chest. Had he really just said that? Had he really just confessed to his roommate, and sometimes enemy, of seven years? What in the name of Crowley, Alistair Almighty and all the Ancient Gods was he thinking? He waited for the response, feeling like he was waiting for his execution. Each second crawled by until finally, Simon spoke "You... you what?"

Leave it to Simon Snow. Baz swallowed and whispered "I like you, Simon." Again, the Mage's Heir sat in blank faced silence. It was almost unbearable, and Baz was about to run away when suddenly, his roommate began to smile. Then he started to chuckle, and finally let out a full on laugh. Now Baz really wanted to crawl into a corner and die. Of all the ways this possibly could have gone, this seemed like maybe the worst "I wasn't joking, Snow." Baz said, his gut twisting painfully. Simon just smiled warmly. "I know, Baz. I've been trying to tell you the same thing for weeks." Baz'sjaw dropped and his heart skipped a beat as Simon continued. "Baz, I've liked you for over a year now, and I really wanted to tell you, but I was afraid you would laugh."

"What, like you just did?" That shut him up. Simon turned red. "Well, yes. I'm so sorry, Baz. It's just that I was trying so hard to find the perfect time and then you just wander in and say it." He stood up from his chair and crossed the room to where Baz was standing, timidly grabbing his hands. "I really, really, like you." He said quietly. Staring into Simon's eyes, Baz felt himself lean forward almost involuntarily, gently brushing their lips together. Grinning at the closeness he had wanted for so long, he whispered back "I really like you, too."

**This chapter was a little different, but I had an idea for three one-shots of different times their relationship changed. **

**The next chapter will be up as soon as possible! **


	17. Q is for Question

**So sorry it's been such an insanely long time since I ****updated! Things have been crazy. **

**This chapter got kind of long… Oh well. Simon tries to propose to Baz.**

Q is for Question

Simon could feel his heart pounding with every step as he walked forward to greet his boyfriend in front of the restaurant they'd had a reservation at for over a month. This was it, tonight was the night. He patted his pocket where he had been keeping the ring for almost a year nervously. When he had gotten it, he had been absolutely certain that nothing could possibly go wrong; that he and Baz would be together forever and that of course Baz would say yes, but the closer he got to actually taking the next step and asking the question, the more uncertain he became. Any number of things could go wrong and, with his luck, they very likely would.

Simon shoved his nerves down and smiled at Baz, pulling him into a giant hug.

"How was your day?" he asked conversationally as they walked towards the table. Baz immediately went into a rant about something that had happened at work, rolling his eyes and waving his hands around for emphasis, but Simon was finding it very hard to concentrate. His mind kept flying to the ring in his pocket and how he was going to attempt to get it onto Baz's finger by the time the night had ended. He took a deep breath, trying to focus on the words of advice Penelope and Agatha had provided earlier that day.

* * *

"Really Simon, you're over-thinking this." Agatha said gently "Just be yourself, Baz doesn't need anything more."

The Mage's Heir collapsed forward onto the table. "But this should be something big and incredible, something that he'll always remember, something -"

"Oh for Crowley's sake, Simon!" Penelope exclaimed "I thought that after dating him for almost ten years you would have shut up, but you still talk about him as much as you did when we were in school! And, apparently you're still just as thick! Baz doesn't need any big fancy gestures. In fact, I'm pretty sure they annoy him! Stop being an idiot and just propose already!"

Agatha placed a hand on her girlfriend's shoulder to calm her. She smiled her trademark smile at Simon and said, "What Penny means is that Baz is madly in love with you, and he always has been. No matter how you ask him, he's going to remember it, so just go simple."

Penelope picked up her coffee mug, grumbling. "I'm pretty sure that I meant stop being an idiot and just do it." Then she looked over at her girlfriend and sighed. "But I guess that works, too."

* * *

"...What do you think?"

"Huh?" Simon came out of his reverie to see a rather annoyed looking Baz sitting in front of him, one eyebrow crawling towards his widow's peak. "Oh, umm... I totally agree."

"You agree with what?" Simon squirmed under the vampire's stare. "I- uh- I agree that... I agree with... You see, I think-"

"You weren't listening at all were you?" Snow hunched his shoulders defeatedly and shook his head. "Sorry, Baz. My mind is just somewhere else today."

Baz sighed and shook his head, but he had the glint of a smile in his eyes "Typical. And may I ask where your mind was today?"

"Just on how I was going to-" Simon suddenly snapped upright and closed his mouth. What on earth was he thinking? He couldn't go and tell Baz now, that would ruin everything! And after he had planned every detail of the evening. They were going to start with dinner, then take a walk through the beautiful park nearby. Simon would lead Baz over to the fountain, where he had planned a marvelous bit of magic, then propose there in the starlight. He COULD NOT ruin that! Trying to come off as nonchalant, he leaned back on his chair (almost knocking it and the table over and earning another eyebrow raise from Baz) and squeaked "Nothing."

"...Uh huh." The two stared at each other for a moment longer, Baz caught somewhere between laughing and trying to find an explanation for his boyfriend's weird behavior, and Simon wishing that there was a spell to keep his face from turning red. Finally, Baz dismissed the strangeness as just normal Simon Snow behavior and picked up his menu. "Well, let's order. I'm starving."

* * *

"It's bound to come sooner or later. Quit worrying." Simon tried to take Baz's advice, but they had been waiting for over an hour, and he was beginning to get annoyed.

"We haven't even seen the waiter once since we ordered," he grumbled. "And why are you so calm? Usually I'm the one trying to keep you from storming the kitchen."

Baz smiled "Well, one of us has to be the calm one and it's obviously not you."

"I just wanted everything to go perfect tonight."

"What's so special about tonight."

Simon kicked himself.

"Nothing!" he said. "Just, you know... Nothing."

This time Baz didn't let it go quite as easily. He leaned forward and studied Simon, obviously concerned. "Something's going on. Just tell me what it is."

"Nothing is wrong." If Baz's eyebrow went up any further, it would no longer be on his face. Simon put up his hands. "Honestly! It's just... something that..."

"Just tell me!"

"Well... Oh look! the food is here!" Grateful for a distraction, Simon jumped to his feet, which proved to be a mistake. The table, along with the glasses, overturned.

After they had been moved to another table and a very red faced Simon had apologized to anyone who would listen, he and Baz finally prepared to eat their food.

"This looks delicious." Baz said with a grin. "I can see why you thought it was worth destroying a table."

To embarrassed to pick up on his boyfriends joking tone, Simon hung his head, miserably saying, "I'm sorry."

Baz laughed and reached over to grab his hand. "It's fine, Snow." Simon had no reaction, so he continued "In fact, I was kind of expecting it. I mean, you are the biggest klutz in the entire world. Remind me how you ever managed to become one of the most known wizards of our generation?"

At Baz's familiar taunting, Simon began to calm down again. He looked up with a little smile, and his boyfriend leaned over and gave him a quick kiss. "Now," said the vampire with a grin, "Let's eat before anything else can go wrong-"

"BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!" Suddenly an alarm started blaring, and water rained down from sprinklers in the ceiling.

"Fire in the kitchen!" someone yelled "Everybody get out!"

Simon and Baz stood up, joining the throng of panicked people pushing towards the door.

* * *

After they had managed to get out of the building (Simon stopping every other step to help someone), they sat on a bench across the street and watch as firetrucks surrounded the now extinguished building. Baz wrung out his dripping wet sleeves. "Well that was... interesting."

Simon groaned inwardly. Everything was going wrong tonight! He took a deep breath breath and exhaled. He could still save it. The Mage's Heir jumped up with a little to much enthusiasm and said brightly, "Let's go for a walk!"

"Really, Snow?" Baz replied wearily "Couldn't we just call it a night and go home? We could just order food and watch a movie or something."

Simon's heart sank and he looked down at his shoes.

"Alistair and Crowley, Snow, stop making that pathetic face," Baz sighed. "If it means that much to you, we'll go on the bloody walk."

* * *

"We should call the police."

"Can't. they took the phones."

"Well there has to be a phone around here somewhere!" Simon leaned back against a tree, holding his possibly broken nose. Baz walked over to him with a sigh, pulling out his wand and mending it (causing Simon to groan as the broken bone snapped back into place and began to knit itself back together), then summoning their stolen possessions with a smirk.

"Those guys are going to be pretty surprised when the realize that all the stuff they stole is gone." he said, sitting down next to Simon and tapping his various scraps and bruises with his wand. "Honestly, must you always forget that you're a wizard and go storming into battle like that? You could have gotten worse than a broken nose."

"I could have taken them." Simon muttered sheepishly, earning a snort from Baz.

"Sure you could have. That's why you're sitting here covered in bruises and they're perfectly fine. Let me see your eye." Simon turned, and his boyfriend reached out and touched the slowly purpling skin gently before fixing it with his wand.

"Just be more careful" He said with a sigh. The two sat in silence, until Simon remembered his plan and hoisted himself to his feet, reaching down to help Baz up.

"Come on" he said with a smile. "It's only a little ways to the fountain."

The vampire looked at him incredulously "Are you insane? We just got mugged! Besides, it looks like it's going to rain." As if on cue, thunder rumbled in the distance, and Simon looked up to see that the stars had been covered with a thick layer of clouds. With an over dramatic groan, Simon collapsed on the ground.

Finally, Baz was fed up "Alright, what's going on? You've been acting strange all night."

Simon put his hands up to his face and whined "I just wanted everything to be perfect tonight, and somehow it was all completely ruined!"

Baz sighed "Stop being so dramatic, Snow. It wasn't completely awful."

Simon sniffled and looked up. "Yes it was."

"Okay, it was. But we were together, so I had a good time." He sat down and looked up at the darkened sky. "I just want to know what's up. I mean, what's so important about-" He stopped suddenly and looked over at Simon. "I didn't forget some sort of anniversary or something, did I?"

Simon shook his head "No you didn't, I just wanted to do something… I had something planned."

"What did you have planned?" Simon gulped. As he sat up to look at Baz, it started to rain lightly, but he barely noticed. He'd had a great plan, but now that he was there, looking at the man he loved, all that flew out the window. His conversation with Agatha came back into his head, and he took a steadying breath before standing up, and beckoning to Baz to follow his example.

"I um… I had a big plan, and it was going to be really amazing and unforgettable, but that didn't work out, so this will have to do." He kneeled down in front of Baz, reaching into his pocket and pulling out the ring.

"Tyrannus Basilton Pitch" he said with a nervous smile "I have loved you since the day we met, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Baz stood in complete silence for a minute before a smile started creeping onto his face. Then he began to laugh. Simon stayed kneeling, slowly becoming soaked by the steady rain.

"Um... is that a yes or a no?"

Baz pulled him to his feet and kissed him. "Of course it's a yes, you idiot! It's just..." Baz pulled a small velvet box out of his pocket and grinned. "I was going to give you this when we got home."

"You mean you were going to...?" Baz nodded. The two laughed, and Simon pulled Baz forward into a kiss. Baz broke it off, and they rested their heads together.

"I love you, Snow." Baz said quietly. Simon closed his eyes contentedly.

"I love you, too." He shivered from the cold, driving rain, and Baz immediately draped one arm around his shoulders, raising his wand and creating a shield against the rain. Simon leaned against Baz's shoulder and Baz pulled him closer. They stayed that way all the way home.

** Funny story, this would have been a few hours earlier but I posted it on a Percy Jackson fic by mistake, confusing many people. **

**The next chapter will be up as soon as I ****figure out a good R word.**

**On an unrelated note, HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT CARRY ON?! It's coming out in October!**


	18. R is for Rules

**Ummmmmmm...**

**Hi. **

**So, I'm not dead, and I am so so so so SO sorry for the long wait. It won't happen again... ****At least not for a little while! Anyways, on to the story! **

**I would love to own SnowBaz, but I don't. Rainbow Rowell does. **

Rule Breaking

Simon and Baz had a reputation for rule breaking, and it was a reputation they lived up to. From their first year at Watford they hadn't gone more then a week without at least one small misdemeanor. One night that, even years later, they looked back on with a smile took place in their seventh year, and it all happened because Simon forgot to study for a test.

It was their seventh year at Watford, the year where the teachers piled on tests, quizzes and homework assignments while claiming that the students would thank them for it all when the eighth year rolled around and they were taking the tests that mattered. "Like we aren't panicked enough as it is." Baz said on a particularly homework filled night "They have to give us constant reminders that our lives are going to be determined by a stupid test in less than a year and we're not ready." Simon dropped his pencil and sighed, stretching as he glanced at the clock. "It's almost twelve. Are you done, too?" Baz nodded "I just finished the essay for Estep, and I studied that chapter on phrasing from Possibelf until I went cross-eyed. Plus the worksheet on potions and their uses, the translation on the spells from ancient Greece, studying for the test with Mrs Dodds, the-"

"I get it, Baz." Simon said with a laugh, wheeling his chair around to face his boyfriend. "Can we go to be now?" The vampire sighed tiredly "I thought you'd never ask." The two climbed into Simon's bed, pulling the blankets up under their chins. "Just remember" Simon said, wrapping his arm around Baz "only one more week until break, and then it's nine whole days at Agatha's summer house with the girls. Nothing but rest and relaxation."

"Unfortunately the teachers have decided to jam as much as possible into this week." Replied Baz, "I can't remember what a full nights sleep feels like." For a little while, they sat in silence, then Baz said "Snow?"

"Mhm?"

"Could we study for the Magic in Arithmetics test before class tomorrow?"

"We don't have a test in that class."

"Yeah we do, Professor Welcher told us about it weeks ago." Simon bolted upright, suddenly wide awake. "I completely forgot." He looked down at Baz in horror "Alistair Almighty, I didn't even pick up the reading material from the library."

"Seriously, Snow? You had weeks!" Simon stared blankly ahead, a horrible thought coming to him. "It's too late. I'm going to fail. And Welcher already thinks I'm an idiot. Unless..." He turned to Baz "You got the book, right? I could just look at it quickly tonight, and then I'd be all set!"

Baz shook his head. "I returned it yesterday." He sat up, draping his arms around his boyfriend's slumped shoulders "We'll go pick them up in the morning, and I'll help you through them. It will be okay." Simon shook his head "The library won't be open until after lunch tomorrow, and the test is first thing in the morning." Baz studied Simon's face. His lower lip jutted out, as it often did when he was upset, and he looked like he had just been told his execution was scheduled for the next day. Baz knew he was going to regret what he was about to say, but he just couldn't stand that _look. _He sighed "Well okay then. Let's go get the book."

First rule broken: Leaving the room after curfew

* * *

"We're just going to get the book and go back to our room, okay? I'm exhausted." Baz whispered as they peered round the corner to make sure no teachers were there.

"Of course." Simon whispered back "It'll only take a few minutes. Thanks for coming with me." The two eased around the corner and down the darkened hall quietly. Muttering "Silence is Golden" over the hinges of the giant double doors so they wouldn't creak, Baz led the way into the library. "Alright." he whispered, tiptoeing to one of the many shelves "It's in this section somewhere, the writers name is Steiner. We'll just grab it and-"

"Baz, look at this! Mrs Dodds keeps a diary!" The vampire slapped his forehead with the palm of his hand. Simon had completely forgotten they're mission and ran straight for the school librarian's desk. He now held a small leather bound book with the words "Property of Alecia Dodds" written in neat, spidery words on the cover. "Simon," he said quietly "Put the book down. Crazy Mrs Dodds probably has some sort of spell on it."

"Just one peak?" Simon pleaded "I want to see what the old bat writes about."

"No."

"Please?"

"_No._"

"Pretty please?"

"NO!"

"Pretty please with mint Aero bars on top?"

"What part of no do you not understand?"

"The 'no' part. What if I gave you an Aero bar?" Baz grimaced. He wanted to stick to his guns, but at the same time... He could practically hear the candy calling his name, promising minty goodness. After a moment or two, he shook his head "Not even for an Aero bar."

"I'll do all your homework for you for a week." Baz snorted

"I'm not letting you anywhere near my homework, Snow. I like getting good grades." Simon pouted for a second, then returned to giving Baz puppy dog eyes "Two Aero bars?" he said. Baz didn't respond. Recognizing that his boyfriend was about to give in, Simon walked closer to him, an almost evil grin on his face. "Three?"

"I won't be bribed, Snow."

"Four?"

"...One look." Simon cackled with glee and removed the ribbon that was keeping the book closed. He excitedly opened the book and-

"_BANG!" _

Fire works began exploding from the book, blinding the two boys and filling the room with red, green, and gold sparks. when the noise and the light subsided, Baz looked up and began to laugh. "I told you not to open it, idiot." On Simon's face in large black letters was the word "THIEF"

Simon Snow ran to the window, staring at his reflection in horror. "No. Nonononono NO! I'm going to get in to so much trouble tomorrow." Baz smirked, then suddenly grew somber as a realization hit him "Never mind tomorrow. Everyone in school will have heard that. We've got to get out of here." The two made their way towards the double doors, but Baz grabbed Simon's arm and stopped him in his tracks. "Someone's coming around the corner. We'll have to find another way." Simon and Baz turned and ran through the maze of shelves (Simon stopping for a moment to grab the book he needed for Professor Welcher's class), disappearing into the History section just as Mrs Dodds, Possibelf and Estep in toe, entered the library.

Second Rule Broken: Going into the library after hours without permission

Third: Taking a teacher's private property

Fourth: Taking a book from the library without observing the proper check out procedures (the only person who really cared about this rule was Mrs. Dodds, but she had been known to give over a months worth of detentions for the trifling offense.)

* * *

All Baz had wanted to do was curl up with his boyfriend and go to sleep. Was that really to much to ask? Considering the fact that his boyfriend was Simon Snow, idiot extraordinaire, he supposed it probably was. So there they were, crouching next to a towering shelf of books with two professors and a librarian hot on their trail while Simon desperately rubbed at his brand new magic face tattoo. Baz got the feeling that they wouldn't be sleeping much that night.

"I heard it! I heard it! And look, my logue is lying out here on the floor for anyone to pick up! Who knows what sort of ruffian could have gotten into it and seen what other students have been reading!" As Professor Estep tried (and failed) to placate Mrs Dodds, Baz turned slowly towards Simon, who had stopped mid face run to stare in horror at Baz. Without saying a word, Baz scrunched his eyebrows together, eyes glinted dangerously and stared hard at his boyfriend, getting his message across perfectly.

_We are in this mess because you wanted to read a LIBRARIAN'S LOGUE_?! Simon waved his arms in front of himself frantically.

_I thought it was her diary! _

_And that makes it better?! _

Simon thought for a minute or two, then gave a hopeful smile and shrug _...Yes?_ Baz smacked his forehead, realizing a split second to late that making a loud sound was probably not the best way to avoid capture. He grabbed Simon's hand and dragged him deeper into the library. They wove through the shelves, carefully avoiding their teachers and the bat like librarian who was currently screaming "THE MONGRELS ARE AFTER THE BOOKS! KILL THEM!" Baz tightened his grasp on Simon's hand and quickened his pace. He had led them back to the front of the library. If they could just-

Baz stopped dead in his tracks. Professor Possibelf was standing in front of the double doors. Baz's heart sank, and he sighed, preparing himself for capture. He turned to tell Snow that they needed to give up, but Simon was busy fishing through his pockets. With a triumphant grin, he pulled out three dark grey cubes, which Baz recognized almost immediately. _Mist Makers__. _A single cube, when thrown hard enough, could fill the entire library with smoke. With a wicked grin, Simon threw all three.

Fifth Rule Broken: Possession of Mist Makers (this rule had been made after an unfortunate incident with a computer, a box of the banned toys, four first years (including Baz and Simon) and a tube of toothpaste. The less said the better)

Sixth: Use of Mist Makers on school grounds

Seventh: Use of Mist Makers against teachers (this one would get them a ticket to a very special hell; detentions with Professor Possibelf.)

* * *

Simon and Baz ran blindly away from the crime scene and didn't stop until they were on the other side of the extensive Watford School Campus. Once they were sure that they had escaped, the two boys slumped against the wall, out of breath. Baz grinned "Simon Snow, the goody two shoes Mage's Heir has Mist Makers? I've got to hand it to you, Snow, I'm rather impressed." Simon rolled his eyes and slapped his boyfriend playfully on the arm "Stop it. I'm not _that _much of a goody two shoes."

"Obviously." Baz said, reaching out to trace the word 'thief' on Simon's head. "What on earth are we going to do about this?" Simon stuck out his lower lip and crinkled his nose, which Baz knew was his "deep thinking face", then jumped up excitedly.

"We can paint over it... With paint!" Cue the single eyebrow raise.

"Ladies and gentlemen, the greatest wizard of our generation. We could, as you so eloquently put it "paint over it with paint", _or _we could perhaps remember the fact that we are seventh years at a magic school."

"... We could use magic paint-"

"Now you're just trying to annoy me."

"Always."

Baz rolled his eyes and did his best to maintain his scowl, but it was rather difficult with Simon standing in front of him grinning like an idiot. His expression softened. "Come on, let's go back to our rooms and fix this mess." Simon grabbed his hand and helped him up and they started back towards their room. As they walked- still hand in hand- Baz tried to think of a spell that would undo Mrs Dodds' magic. A simple removal charm could work, but it would most likely be more complicated. Simon said something or other, probably just letting him know they were close to the room, and he nodded before going back to mulling over the problem. Perhaps 'One two undo', (first year magic, but as Professor Possibelf always said "Sometimes the path to greatness lies not in the complex but in the simple".), or perhaps a more advanced poem? At any rate, they could always just use 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder' to create a glamour over it until they were able to get it off. He was so deep in thought, he walked straight into a tree. It was only after the pain wore off that he begin to wonder why he ran into a tree at all, since they were in doors. And it was only at that moment that he realized they were not in fact indoors, but at the edge of the woods. "Baz are you alright?" Simon said from a little ways ahead. The vampire studied his surroundings carefully "Simon," he said slowly "Why aren't we in the castle heading towards our room?"

"Did you hit your head that hard? Let me see-"

"My head is fine, thank you. Now answer the question." Simon raised an eyebrow (trying and failing to pull off Baz's you're-obviously-not-okay-but-I-will-play-along face) "We're looking for Candourweed."

"Why?"

"Because it's supposed to return things to their natural appearance. I thought it would fix my face, and you nodded, so we went out here." Baz dropped his face into his hands then looked back up at Simon. "This" he said "is what I get for spacing out when you're leading the way. And this is what _you _get for only half paying attention in class. A crack pot group of doctors _thought _that when the leaves were rubbed on something it would return to its true shape. What it actually does is give bad hives. Now please tell me you haven't found any, or else we're going to have even more problems on our hands."

"Are you sure? Because I thought Doctor Holdredge said-"

"_Did you or did you not find Candourweed?" _

"I didn't!" Baz let out a sigh of relief, then made a mental note to always pay full attention around his halfwitted boyfriend.

He smiled and said "Good. Now, let's go back to our room, please. I assume that on this little adventure you remembered to leave the door ajar?" Baz watched with growing panic as the Mage's Heir's ever present smile slide off his face. "You did leave it open." He said "Simon, you did leave it open?" He took the silence as a no.

Normally, Baz would have been able to brush it off with a snide remark and an eye roll, but it was nearly two AM and he was very, very tired. "HOW COULD YOU BE SUCH AN IDIOT!?" He screamed "You have been sneaking out at night since we were bloody first years, but it slipped your mind to prop open the door?! You know it locks automatically, with protection charms I might add! And now we're stuck outside, just incase the giant word on your forehead wasn't enough to get us in trouble, you had to go and lock us out!"

"Maybe the kitchen doors open?"

"And maybe we'll find a leprechaun who will lead us to his pot of gold. You can't just ASSUME things like that, because when your assumptions are wrong we end up spending the night in the FOREST! THINK for once! Use your brain! I know it's difficult, but for Crowley's sake TRY!"

"I'm sorry." Baz started to go on another rant, but one look at Simon's face stopped him. His boyfriend was obviously as upset as he was, and Baz was making it worse. Inhaling a steadying breath, he closed the space between them and pulled Simon into a hug. "That was wrong of me." He whispered "it's as much my fault as yours. Im tired, but that's no excuse. I shouldn't have raised my voice."

"It's all right." Whispered Simon in response. Finally, Baz broke away from the embrace and smiled "Now let's go check the kitchen door."

Eight Rule Broken: Leaving the building after curfew

* * *

"Sweet Shakespeare, Simon! We're in enough trouble as it is!" Baa hissed at his boyfriend. "Do you really want to add theft to our list of misdemeanors?" Simon paused his rummaging through the cupboards to roll his eyes at Baz.

"Relax, love. I'm just getting a snack. We're in the kitchen anyways."

"And we shouldn't be. We need to get back to the room and fix your face."

"Why are you so on edge? It's not like we've never grabbed a midnight snack before."

"In case you haven't noticed, our luck has been extremely bad tonight. I'm not taking any risks."

"Come on, Baz." Simon laughed " What else could possibly go wrong?" It was at that moment that the door burst open with a sound like a gunshot, and the cook, holding a broom stick before her like a sword, bellowed "OUT OF MY KITCHEN!". As the two boys dropped to the floor to avoid being seen, Baz glared at Simon and mouthed "You just had to ask."

The two silently crawled through the kitchen, holding their breath every time Cook took a step. She was swinging her broom underneath the counters as she walked, grumbling "Damn students, think you can come and take my food whenever you bloody feel like it. You all just come strutting in here, bold as brass at all hours." She raised her voice a little "Well you ain't so bold now, are ya? Come on, show yourselves! I heard your voices! I know you're there! Been waiting by that door all night, just knew you would come! You've gotten away every night this month, but this time... Oh this time you're mine." She banged the handle of the broom on the floor for emphasis, a wide grin splitting her face. "Now if you're real good and turn yourselves in right now, maybe I won't be too hard on you. I'll give you to the count of three."

They were almost to the door. All they had to do now was slip out when Cook's back was turned. "One..." Baz snuck a glance at her from his hiding spot behind one of the long islands. "Two..." She was bending down to look under a row of cabinets, it was now or never. The two boys slipped through the door and bolted down the hall, not stopping until they were back at the room. Panting slightly, Baz looked over at Simon, who was grinning like he had just won the lottery.

"What on earth are you so happy about?" He said suspiciously. Simon said nothing, simply reached into the deep pockets of his robes and pulled out two large pastries. Baz closed his eyes. "Did you-"

"Grabbed them right before Cook came in." Baz stared at him.

"You do realize that you're completely and totally insane, right?"

Ninth Rule Broken: Entering the kitchen without permission

Tenth Rule Broken: Taking food without permission

* * *

Two delicious pastries, ten failed spells and at least twenty minutes of bickering later, Simon and Baz came to the conclusion that they had absolutely no idea how to go about removing the evidence of their misadventures from Simon's face, and they were growing rather desperate. The clock hung above their door seemed to be counting ever closer to their doom, and there was nothing the could do to prevent it unless one of them came up with a genius plan. And considering the luck they had been having, Baz thought that didn't seem likely.

"We could go see Penelope." Simon said, falling back on his bed. Baz blinked at he had thought to soon.

"Congratulations, Snow. For once you had a sensible idea. Let's go." He stalked out of the room, leaving Simon to scurry after him, rolling his eyes at the vampires frosty attitude, which was mostly for show. Really, he was just aggravated that he hadn't thought of visiting their brainiac friend first. And perhaps he was a bit upset that he had to go for help, but he didn't let that bother him for all, Penelope was not only the smartest pupil in the seventh year, but was probably the smartest young magician in Britain. The girl studied for fun, for Alistair's sake. If anyone knew how to fix their little problem, it would be her.

Eleventh Rule Broken: Sneaking out after curfew (again)

* * *

"I'm sorry, but there's nothing I can do." Baz and Simon deflated as Penny leaned back against the wall, her mass of frizzy hair bouncing as she shook her head "The spell can't be undone. The only thing to do is wait it out. It shouldn't last more than a week."

"But Penny," Simon whined "I can't go to classes like this! Do you have any idea how much trouble I'll be in?"

"Well then maybe you should have thought of that before you decided to be a complete and total ignoramus!" Penelope growled. She was still angry that they had woken her up at three thirty in the morning the night before a test. Although since Agatha's bed was still neatly made and she had been sitting on it uncomfortably, her face bright red, Baz wasn't entirely sure the two had been sleeping. And if that was the case, Penny was really going to kill them.

"Perhaps I can help." Agatha said, putting a calming hand on Penny's shoulder "This is my concealer. It's enchanted to last twenty four hours before it starts to fade, so you could just put it on every morning and be okay all day. I don't actually use it much, so I won't miss it for the week." She handed Simon a small glass jar, and he stared at it in horror.

"Makeup? Aggie, how will makeup help anything?" Penny and Baz stared at him, both preparing long rants on his idiocy. Fortunately for Simon, good natured Agatha beat them to the punch.

"It's not like lipstick or something, Simon. It's the same color as your skin, you just use it to cover things up." She said, unscrewing the lid and getting a little on her finger. She smeared it carefully over part of 'T' on Simon's forehead then leading him to the mirror to show him the results.

"Ohhhh." He said with a smile "I get it!" Penny gave Baz a sympathetic look

"I'm sorry you have to deal with him all the time." She whispered, and he chuckled. Looking over at his boyfriend, who was rubbing Agatha's concealer all over his face with a look of amazement, he said

"He can be a nuisance, but it's worth it."

After Agatha was satisfied that Simon knew how to apply his new concealer, Simon and Baz bade the girls goodnight and returned to their room.

"And I have just enough time to read the book and maybe get some sleep!" Simon said, startling Baz, who had just started to change into his pajamas, ready to go to bed. He had completely forgotten the purpose of their outing. He sighed. After all that, he really just wanted to lay down with Simon, but apparently tonight wasn't the night for that.

"Alright." Baz said. "But don't stay awake too much longer. We need to get there at eight thirty tomorrow, and I am _not_ going to end up being late after all that."

"Okay." Simon mumbled, waving his wand over the book and saying the speed reading spell, "_Quick flip_", under his breath.

* * *

"Okay, class!" Professor Welcher said with a smile "Time's up! You may put your pencils down and leave. I'll come around and collect your tests." There was a clatter of pencils and chairs being moved as the class left, sighing and moaning as they went. The professor looked around and realized that two students were still sitting in the back row. "Simon? Basilton?" He said, walking forward. When he got closer, he realized they were both fast asleep, their pencils still held loosely in their hands and their unfinished tests sitting forgotten on the desks in front of them.

**Sorry Sorry Sorry Sorry. **

**In my defense, I was in germany on exchange and only had access to fanfiction via my phone, which didn't really let me write. Not much of an excuse, but it's all I've got. The next few chapters will be up soon, a couple weeks at most. And they (hopefully) won't be as long as this one. I got really into it and kind of forgot that I was supposed to be writing short one shots. Oh well, 4000 words isn't THAT different from 100 words.**

**I know that I disappeared for three months and don't deserve reviews, but they are always appreciated! Thank:) **


	19. S is for Sometimes

**Yay! An Update that's actually kind of on time! Anyways, on with the fic, I hope you enjoy it. **

S is for Sometimes

Sometimes, it was all just too much for Simon. On days like this, where the Mage swooped in with a cryptic message then left without a word, leaving him to face another challenge alone, even though he was only seventeen. When things were falling apart everywhere he looked, and the evidence of the humdrum was creeping in, polluting his world. When nothing came easily, and he just wanted to give up, to give in to that little feeling constantly in the back of his mind that he wasn't really meant to be there. That he was just a gandry orphan who had gotten in by mistake, and he wasn't smart enough or strong enough or brave enough to be the famed Mage's Heir. Sometimes, it was just too much _because he wasn't good enough._

Sometimes, Simon wanted it all to stop. As he collapsed on his bed, not bothering to change out of his wrinkled school clothes (and not really caring that he should be relaying the details of his meeting with the Mage to Penny so they can begin their newest adventure, because in all honesty he didn't _want _to begin a new adventure), he wondered what his life would have been like if the Mage hadn't come and welcomed him into this strange, magical world all those years ago. It would have been dull, and he wouldn't have had so many wonderful friends, but at least things would slow down. No more fighting bizarre creatures that seemed to come straight from his nightmares, no more worrying about the giant battle that will supposedly take place next year, possibly taking his life, no more first year students staring at him as he walked by and saying in loud whispers "_It's him. It's the Mages Heir. I heard about him._" Just a normal life. It might be nice. Sometimes Simon wanted it to stop _because he couldn't handle it._

Sometimes, though, despite everything, Simon was alright. When Baz wandered into their room, dropping his bag and complaining about some history final, Simon didn't want him to see the tear tracks on his face, didn't want him to know that he was weak. Baz's voice trailed off when he noticed Simon, and Simon was scared (although he didn't really know why. This was _Baz_) that he would laugh, or spread the word that the Heir is a fake, or barrage him with questions he didn't want to answer. Instead, without saying a word, Baz lay down next to him, pulling Simon to his chest and resting a hand gently on his head. He held him firmly, as if to say _"__It's alright now. I'm here." _Finally, he said "Are you alright?", staring down at Simon's face with concern. Simon smiled and nodded.

"I am now." Sometimes, Simon was alright _because of Baz._

**The end! The next chapter should be up within a week, but I have a bunch of homework, so no promises...**

**Reviews would be awesome! Thanks:)**


	20. T is for Tickles

**Late again. Sorry. Anyway, here is the next chapter. **

T is for Tickles 

"Why does everything have to be so horribly unfair!" Simon cried, punching the wall, "Why can't something go my way just once? After all I've been through, can't the universe just cut me a break? I can't take it anymore, I really can't!"

"By the Bard, Simon, it's only a bit of rain." Baz said calmly, turning the page of his book (one that he had been meaning to read for months, but hadn't gotten around to) "It will probably pass in an hour or so." Simon responded by falling to the floor with a loud 'thud' and whining.

"Yes, but that's an hour or so that we won't be swimming in the lake, enjoying the beautiful day." He rolled his way over to the foot of Baz's office chair and looked up at him with his lip jutted out as far as it could go. When Baz continued to read and ignore his pain, Simon said, "Well, aren't you going to comfort me? I'm extremely upset." Without looking up, Baz nudged Simon with his foot.

"Shh. There there. Everything will be all right."

"I don't feel consoled."

"You poor dear." Simon scowled and rolled over.

"Well fine. I'm not talking to you anymore."

"That's nice, Simon."

Simon crossed his arms and stared out the window at the sheets of rain. After a minute or two, he rolled back and started pulling on Baz's pant leg. "Baz I'm bored."

"I don't care."

"But I'm really bored."

"Go read a book."

"I'm not a book person." Baz turned another page and placed a well aimed kick to Simon's gut.

"That might be the most idiotic thing you've ever said to me." Simon groaned and pulled a little harder on Baz's pant leg.

"I'm bored."

"And I'm attempting to finish my book."

"But I'm bored!"

"Don't care."

"Boooored."

"Shut up."

"Boredy bored bored."

"I am going to kill you."

"Entertain me."

"Please leave me alone."

"Tell me a joke."

"Have you heard the one about the time I used my book to smash your annoying face in?"

"Oh, come on. Make me laugh!" Baz snapped his book shut and stood up.

"You want to laugh? Fine, I'll make you laugh." Before Simon could react, Baz had pounced on him, pinning him down with his knees and tickling him. Simon tried to escape, but Baz grabbed onto his feet as he wriggled away. Simon screamed and laughed, desperately trying to escape.

"Baz- Stop- HA! I can't breath!" Baz grinned and attacked Simon's ribs. After a long struggle, Simon rolled away and jumped to his feet. "You- you have no idea how much trouble your in." Simon gasped, "Because now, I'm going to get REVENGE!" On the word revenge, Simon lunged forward, grabbing Baz and tickling him. Baz raised an eyebrow and looked down at the Mage's Heir, who had given up on his armpits and stomach and had moved on to his feet.

"You do realize I'm not ticklish, right?" Baz asked as Simon wiggled his fingertips over the soles of his feet. Simon sat back on his heels and crossed his arms.

"Well that's just unfair." Baz laughed and stood up. He walked over to his chair and picked up his book again.

"All right, now will you let me read? I'm almost done with this book." Simon lay flat on his back.

"Fine." He sighed A few minutes passed, and Simon rolled over to look out the window again. Outside, the clouds were parting to reveal a bright blue sky. Simon shot up and charged towards the door. "It stopped raining!" He yelled as he ran, "Let's go, Baz!"

Baz looked up and sighed. Carefully marking his place as he went to follow his ridiculous boyfriend, Baz mumbled ,"I'm never going to finish my book."

**A little heads up, my entire class is being forced to go on a community service trip for two weeks without any form of technology (I'm really excited, but I'm still going to complain), so don't expect an update for a little while. I will try to write a few chapters so I can post a bunch right when I get back. **

**Review? Maybe? **


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